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May has been a difficult month for me with one health issue after another. Feeling lousy is one of my biggest struggles as far as staying focused on losing weight and eating healthy. When I'm sick or in a flare-up I want to pull the covers over my head and shut out the world. It was an off-and-on month as far as staying on track. Yet, I tend to forget the reason I have so many health problems to begin with is because I've neglected to properly care for my body for too many years.
Over the past week or two I realized how much eating healthy and exercising affect every part of my life. I feel lousy when I don't eat balanced, which eventually makes me even sicker. It becomes a vicious cycle of self-destruction.
If I'm eating junk or a lot of pre-packaged meals, I find I get depressed, stressed, and I start to worry about everything. Old habits I thought I had conquered rush back with a vengeance. I start to doubt my ability to lose weight and my confidence is shaken. When I feel sick it affects me spiritually. I find I don't have the energy to devote to my writing and ministry. It doesn't take long for the lack of discipline in my physical life to show up in my mental, emotional, and spiritual life.
After realizing how awful I felt and how negatively it was affecting everything in my life, I got back on track. Usually, it only takes a day or two of eating healthy again for my mind to feel clearer and for the depression to lift. I feel like I'm in a dark pit and then slowly I start to see the light again. I regain my courage and keep pressing on, one day at a time.
I went to my Weight Watchers meeting this morning and felt encouraged and inspired. A new leader took the Friday morning class at our local center a few months ago, and he is a very motivating and fun person. He said before he joined Weight Watchers he was going through a discouraging time. He was miserable, had lost his job, etc. That was when he decided to take care of his health. He talked about how one day he said to himself, "I may as well look hot while I'm miserable!" The whole class about died laughing, but there's a lot of truth in that statement. Often we experience things in life that pull us down and make us feel lousy, but we can change our attitude and take care of our health in the midst of any life event. I was encouraged listening to his story about how his healthy lifestyle journey began during a time of crisis in his personal life. We can make the best of difficult times by making the choice to take better care of ourselves.
Thankfully, I did manage to lose weight this month in spite of getting side-tracked, but not as much as I could have lost if I stayed focused. After the meeting, I went grocery shopping and filled my cart with fresh organic fruits and
vegetables, Greek yogurt, and lean meats. I spent the afternoon
preparing healthy food to take to work tomorrow. I'm feeling positive once again. I know I can do this. I want to do it, simply because it affects every aspect of my life.
As I had my quiet time today, a scripture that stood out to me in my Bible reading was Romans 12: 11:
"Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord."
Being zealous means having a burning desire to please God. It means being willing to keep serving God even when it's hard. One way we serve and honor God is by taking care of our health, so we have the energy and strength to do what He placed us on this earth to do. I'm afraid my zeal and spiritual fervor were lacking a lot this month. I fell into old habits of coming home from work (after sitting for 10 hours at a computer) and laying on the couch instead of exercising. I grabbed processed foods instead of wholesome foods. I sunk fast into that old familiar pit of despair. I lost my fervor to keep going, and I became lazy and depressed.
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